Nuclear Beef

Like quite a few other blog-wh0res, I am posting about the new movie Serenity because they're hooking me up with free tickets to see it this tuesday. I was going to go see it anyway, because Firefly rocks. But hey, the price (free) is right. I even used one of the images from the site, tho I cropped out out all the unimportant bits. I'll even be posting a review. How awesome is that.

UPDATE: The PR company incompetently messed up the blogger handling at the SF Preview so I'm going to give them the review that their half-assed effort deserves.

'Serenity' was great. If you liked Firefly at all, or if you've ever enjoyed an episode of Star Trek, Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica or any other Sci Fi or Action movie, you should go see it. They did a good job of staying true to the TV show and putting in fan service while making a movie that would also entertain newcomers. It was real good. The marketing people could use some work.

Joss Whedon, the Oscar® - and Emmy - nominated writer/director responsible for the worldwide television phenomena of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE, ANGEL and FIREFLY, now applies his trademark compassion and wit to a small band of galactic outcasts 500 years in the future in his feature film directorial debut, Serenity. The film centers around Captain Malcolm Reynolds, a hardened veteran (on the losing side) of a galactic civil war, who now ekes out a living pulling off small crimes and transport-for-hire aboard his ship, Serenity. He leads a small, eclectic crew who are the closest thing he has left to family –squabbling, insubordinate and undyingly loyal.

Posted by darwin at 07:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

ok guys! (and horny chix)

this is called Ultimate Spiderman... I mean, just listen to the name, doesnt that sound good huh?

mega spiderman, thats just for beginners
ultra spiderman, now thats just over the top

and superduper spiderman, yeah, dont get me started on that

FINALLY we're proud to present the game anticipated all the year

U L T I M A T E S P I D E R M A N ! ! !

yeah, ok... fuck off, the game sucks...

(I, of course, did not download this xbox game, and you shouldn't either.)

Posted by darwin at 03:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

'Bad By Myself'
by Biz Markie from his 1993 album All Samples Cleared on Cold Chillin' Records

Now it's no secret that The Beef is a fan of Johnny 'Guitar' Watson. Sure, he was an immensely skilled guitarist who changed with the times and had success in more than one genre. What I really love about his music is the raw personality that comes across. You get the feeling that the man means what he's saying, and also that a live show would blow your top off. I suppose it's a testament to his love of performance that he died on stage. Respect.

Larry Williams has an amazing life story. You should click that link, because it's a shocking example of what failure and misfortune can do to a talented man. Or maybe it's just another example of how the music industry eats people. Discovered at age 19 in New Orleans, he had some early success making R&B and Rock & Roll records. Then he was busted for 'selling narcotics' (now that's gangster) and drifted for a while. In the 60s, he hooked up with Johnny Watson and made a few records for the legendary Okeh records which had some success. The 70s didn't go so well, and at the start of the 80s he was discovered in his home with a bullet wound in his head. Damn.

On this record from 1967, Larry is shining. Johnny gives counsel to Williams over an uptempo R&B track with some somewhat questionable orchestration. But with a vocal duet like that and such a hopping drum track, it's hard to complain too much. It was 1967, everyone was doing that stuff.

You can go on and find you somebody else
I can live cheaper by myself!
I don't need no woman to help me starve to death! Can you dig it?

I can do bad by myself
I don't need no help
To starve to death
I can do that on my own

I have a tendency to focus on the benefits of a relationship, and ignore the costs. It's nice to have friends like Biz and Johnny 'Guitar' Watson to remind me that the choice is mine. I don't need no help making myself unhappy and stressed out. K. Thx.

Then she popped the question
And asked me for some dough
I looked her in the face and said
"Hell No!"
You're a head nurse and you want my dough?
You must be crazy as hell

(Introspective shoutouts to Cinnacism, who I hope does not get blown away by Hurricane Rita.)

Posted by darwin at 11:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I know I've been slacking on the Kari pics, but Discovery Channel has been slacking on the new episodes of Mythbusters. That's my excuse! I suppose I should get some caps from old eps but I'm busy reading Groo comics. So here's two nice pictures of Kari interacting with Mythbuster Adam Savage.

First, we have Kari on the dock talking about the shark myths in that infamous episode.

(click for larger)

And then, a special dedication to the skinheads out there... Kari Byron in a flight jacket. Oi.

(click for larger)

Enjoy. Also please no filthy comments, huh?

Posted by darwin at 01:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (11)

Decade-Plus MC HipHop Audio Beef Today. Don't front, you know he got you open.

Before I start ranting, I'd like to let you know that these two tracks are from Buckshot and 9th Wonder. Buckshot is a MC from New York, 9th Wonder is a producer from North Carolina. They both have a history of accomplishment and their new album together is really quite good.

Both of the tracks above feature Buckshot's bulletproof flow over sample-based beats that recall the Beatminerz and, well, sound great. Subject matter isn't extradimensional but Buck's still got it. Punchlines, tight rhymes and personality to spare. Some of the beats sound like 9th Wonder's second-string, but the first string is going straight on the radio so I don't blame him. If this album had marketing behind it (or if Hip-Hop radio wasn't pay-for-play) there'd be at least two singles off it. But it's 2005 so you've got to hear it on my little MP3 blog.

Enjoy. Ok. Now the ranting.

(I'm wondering if maybe MP3 blogging really has jumped the shark. You see, elbo.ws is indexing over 500 MP3 blogs. Since they started indexing them on January 30th, there have been 419 posts about the Arcade Fire. 205 Posts about Kanye West! 183 Posts about M.I.A.

Even this guy (whom I personally dislike) posts about new music with some frequency. What's he got that you ain't got? Why do I have to post Hip-Hop tracks that the guys with pure Hip-Hop blogs should have posted two months ago? MP3 blogs suck.)

UPDATE: To the dipshit who keeps trackback spamming this post. If you had two fucking braincells to rub together, you would notice that all of your disgusting trackback spam gets FUCKING DELETED MOMENTS AFTER YOUR AUTOMATED BULLSHIT PROGRAM SUBMITS IT. PERHAPS YOU SHOULD GET THE FUCKING MESSAGE, YOUR SHIT ISN'T BEING INDEXED BY GOOGLE WHEN YOU DUMP IT HERE. GO FUCK WITH SOME BLOG WHERE THE OWNER IS TOO STUPID TO DEFEAT YOU. IDIOT.

Posted by darwin at 01:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Some Different Beef Today. Comics Beef!

(Groo doing his best Mayor Nagin impersonation. Click for Larger.)

I've been following the controversy surrounding the disaster relief response to hurricane Katrina. To balance the overwhelming humanity of the suffering, I've also been reading Groo comics. For those who don't know, Groo is a barbarian whose stupidity is matched only by his love of slaying people in combat. He's incredibly dim, but you know.. you can learn a lot from a dummy.

Each story ends with a moral, and this issue's moral seems particularly relevant to the New Orleans clusterfuck. Groo is so reknowned for destroying whatever town he wanders into that the people of the town of Miggledy freak out when they hear he's coming. By the time he actually arrives, they've destroyed their own town in their panic!

In case you don't want to actually read the comic to get the punchline, here it is :

(The Moral. Click for larger.)

Yep.

(Use CDisplay to read cbr files, which are actually just renamed .rar files. Oh, and give some money to The Red Cross, huh? Also, the K-Otix Bush Katrina Diss Track over at Soul Sides is excellent. I don't necessarily agree with it, but it's funny as hell!)

Posted by darwin at 04:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Hip-Hop Supersession Audio Beef Today. The Wu Vet travels to Cypress Hill for a Grandmaster chess championship.

It seems as if Hip-hop artists are developing some sort of longevity program. After being cut from the.. um.. Cold Chillin Labels, they end up on either Sanctuary Records or BabyGrande. I'm glad for it, because the music sounds fresher than their desperate attempts to hit again on the majors.

Due out in late October, we have a chess-themed offering from these two industry veterans. The GZA, of course, is from the legendary Wu Tang Clan, DJ Muggs is the beat titan behind Cypress Hill. Neither has changed much over the years, but they've steadily developed their craft. Muggs still has an amazing ear for a spooky loop and GZA can still rip it in slow motion.

The 'Unknown Title (Crime Story)' track is a classic storytelling rap from the Genius. He's one of the best out there at this technique, which with this subject matter comes across like a Hip-Hop CSI. 'All In Together Now' is a tribute (with RZA) to the late, great ODB. Remember, kids... don't do drugs.

(The rest of the advance sounds pretty darn good. Certainly worth a listen if you ever enjoyed a Wu Tang or Cypress Hill album. DJ Muggs is apparently also doing Mash Up Radio on Sirius Satellite radio. Weird.)

UPDATE: MP3 links fixed.

Posted by darwin at 03:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)